Step Eight of the Twelve Steps to Success for Young Adults:
Three Toes In The Water
This is the eighth step of an ongoing series of articles based on helping struggling teens find success. The previous columns can be found here:
Intro
Step One: Strengths and Challenges
Step Two: Choosing A Mentor
Step Three: Positive Mindsets.
Step Four: Being Generative
Step Five: Hobbies and Volunteering
Step Six: Time Stealers
Step Seven: Follow Your Bliss
A New Direction: Three Toes in the Water
You can study, you can practice, you can philosophize all you want—It means diddly until you test it out there in the “real world”. If you have followed the previous steps to success you have learned to transform yourself beyond your safety zone, learning to seek out what makes you happy in a disciplined, organized way with proper support from mentors, friends and family.
Now comes the next step for a young adult searching to find a new direction and their success in life:
- Putting three toes in the water: Why three? Do one thing and it works (or doesn’t) it could just be “luck”. Do two things and it can still be an anomaly. Do three things and now you have a pattern. True, naysayers can poop on pretty much anything, but if you get three consecutive successes, I say, “Yahoo!”. If you get three straight failures, remember Edison took 10,000 wrong tries to find the right filament, creating the incandescent bulb.
- Picking a new pond to swim in: Choose university, college, a business or a fourth choice. Create a 12 week test and bring your recent successes into a new “real life” situation. You can do almost anything if you do it with passion and are willing to slog through the occasional grinding that accompanies learning any skill, course or trade.
- University or College: Pick a subject that you would love to learn more about. Something you could see yourself doing for the next 10 years and liking it. Go the three schools in your area, get their syllabus, meet with the registrar and pick three classes: two core-related and one easy and fun class to test our your learning chops on.
- Entrepreneur: Pick something you love doing. See who makes a living selling that product or service. Go volunteer to work there for a 12 week period. It might be in sales, or promotions or stock-boy, but make sure you know where you want to end up in 12 weeks.
- Read: “How to Win Friends and Influence People” by Dale Carnegie (HTWFAIP). It’s the best book I found to teach the basic skills on how to “sell” yourself and getting people to want to help you by being genuinely interested in them.
- Recap: Pick three subjects of interest for one semester or a 12 week mentor-ship and use the tools for success to do the work (and homework required). Find people who are passionate about that pond and get to know them. You can learn so much from passionate people who succeed.
A few of the most important tips I could ever give you in pursuing a new direction:
Secretaries hold the keys! Always be respectful of the people you first meet wherever you go. Very often, these people know who the best person you should be talking to is. Take a moment to learn their names, use it in a natural way two or three times in the conversation. Find out why they chose to work there and what they like about it.
Avoid interrogating! Listening is the best way to converse. However, as “the lost chapter” in HTWFAIP taught us: there are some people who are just plain never going to give you the time of day or be kind. So, don’t be shy if you are not getting anywhere to respectfully ask to see a more senior person. Sometimes that is enough to get the front line person to help you, sometimes it gets you to the next level.
Don’t forget to enjoy the pond. It’s new and you benefit by embracing every opportunity you take to grow. May the three toes guide your steps to adventure!
“If I have ever made any valuable discoveries, it has been owing more to patient attention than to any other talent”… Sir Isaac Newton
Stay tuned for more upcoming articles from Ken
Friday, March 9th Giving Teens Their Space.
Friday, March 16th Teenagers: Give Them What They Want?
Friday, March 23rd Parents Who Care Too Much.
Friday, March 30th Something from the news.
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What new directions are you considering in your life? How do you look at finding your success? Share your thoughts in the Comments section below.
Related:
Why Do Some Teens Never Seem To Achieve Their Goals?













